When it comes to the wondrous, complicated, and thoroughly mesmerizing vagina, the most important thing to know is this: A healthy vagina is a happy vagina. Vaginas are a bit finicky and kind of bitchy. A lot of things make them mad.
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Won't somebody please think of the vaginas?!
Remember that scene in Broad City when Ilana sees police officers in the subway station, so she stashes her weed in her vagina? People with vaginas have attempted to smuggle or hide loaded pistols, Rolex watches, marijuana pipes, crack, lighters, money, cellphones, cigarettes, makeup, fireworks yes, really , alcohol and a host of other drugs and stolen items in their vag. Of course, few people would actually consider inserting things like loaded guns and fireworks inside their vaginas. But sometimes, in an attempt to make things more interesting in the bedroom, some do make questionable decisions about what actually goes in there. Penises are totally allowed to enter mouths, vaginas and buttholes. But remember to put a condom on it to avoid STIs and unwanted pregnancies. A note: Flavored condoms should only be used for oral sex , as the flavor chemicals can irritate your vaginal lining. Fingers attached to hands, of course! You can improve your safer sex practices by wearing latex gloves easily purchased in drugstores and adding lube.
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The year was a rough year for vaginas. Between constantly facing threats to limit access to reproductive and sexual health care to being bombarded with terrible advice regarding what to stick up there cucumbers, glitter, jade eggs , VapoRub, wasp nest and far too many others to living under a president who bragged about grabbing them, people with vaginas have had a lot to think about. Aside from succumbing to the barrage of vaginal quackery out there ahem, Goop , we now know a bit more about some of the other missteps in that area — specifically, objects people got stuck in their vaginas that landed them in the emergency room. Consumer Product Safety Commission.
We were so close to making it to the end of without more news that the world is a truly terrifying place. But sadly, some bright spark went and trawled through the U. The, um, summary was compiled by the Adequate Man , and shines a very unforgiving light onto the multitude of strange objects doctors have found inside vaginas over the last 12 months.